Post #26: Love in the Time of Coronavirus
- Nana Beryl Jupiter
- Mar 31, 2020
- 11 min read
Updated: Jul 23, 2020
Of course I am referring to Nana love in my blog title which takes its inspiration from a book title which has been resounding in my head a lot lately. However “Love in the Time of Cholera” was a romance. But as a Nana, I love my grandchild so much that I am willing to risk illness to be with him. And I have already proven that, repeatedly, even before the current coronavirus pandemic.
Lately most of us are self-isolating due to this unsettling and expansive disease, also known as COVID-19. And the early statistics on this new rampant virus seem to support its being more problematic and potentially fatal for elders, thus quarantining seniors from their younger loved ones, who if not even sick could still be coronavirus carriers. Sad times for grandparents.
Yet there are plenty of other less deadly diseases that grandparents might catch from their dear grandchildren who inadvertently share bacteria and viruses circulating commonly through daycare and schools. And I might be even more susceptible to illness from my grandson Cooper and family who live in faraway Fiji, a potential petri dish of tropical diseases for which my immune system is less likely to be familiar.
So going back to September, 2017, Stacy was already inquiring if I could meet her in Honolulu in April, 2018, to babysit grandson Cooper while she attended meetings. Jesse and I had just been in Fiji in August for both Stacy and Jason’s wedding and Cooper’s first birthday celebration (see my blog posts #23 and 24). Coming home from that trip, we had no future plans for all being together. So any invitation for face-to-face Nana time was music to my ears. And it sounded like a win-win situation, both being with Cooper while vacationing in Hawaii.
But when Stacy told me her meeting dates, about April 13 to 20, I replied by email, “Probably OK, but we are invited to my cousin Lois’s daughter’s wedding on Sat, April 21, in Miami, meaning I would like to be there by Friday, April 20. It is not critical but I would like to go.” We agreed to iron out the full details of Hawaii departure later on and possibly find some substitute babysitting for Cooper if Stacy’s meeting did indeed extend all the way through April 20.
By early 2018, as we were planning the specifics of travel and accommodations for Honolulu, Stacy had more U.S. meetings on her calendar for which she wanted me to babysit accompanying Cooper. Again I was happy to oblige. Her employer Wildlife Conservation Society had asked their regional directors to attend successive meetings in Florida and New York in March. So I was working out all the details for those meetings and Hawaii around the same time. Fortunately, we have family in both Florida and New York who were glad to host all of us.
For Hawaii, I found on AirBnB a two bedroom, two-bath apartment rental in Waikiki which appeared fairly toddler friendly. Having had numerous meetings in that vicinity, Stacy approved the location, noting “Looks conveniently located to the beach, mall, Waikiki shopping, etc.”
I needed to arrive at the same time as Stacy and Cooper. Jesse wanted to join us but would arrive a few days later so he would not miss as much work, considering he would also be going with me from Hawaii directly to the Miami wedding. Stacy’s husband Jason might come to Hawaii, depending on his work situation closer to the dates.
Cooper care for the March meetings had gone exceedingly well. All the family in Florida and New York were thrilled to meet Cooper and catch up with Stacy. And they were also an enormous help to Nana Beryl, especially at my sister Carol’s house in Boca Raton when I was immersed in 24/7 toddler care with initially quite jetlagged Cooper while Stacy flew off to her northern Florida meeting for several days.
So going into the Hawaii trip in April, I was pretty much up to speed on Cooper care. The original plans for Stacy, Cooper and me was arrival on Tuesday, April 10. But on (my) April 6, I received this email from Stacy:
“Just letting you know that there is a tropical depression forming west of Fiji predicted to turn into a cyclone [southern hemisphere hurricane]. There will be a lot of rain and flooding with potential to disrupt travel. I’ll keep you posted. Fingers crossed we can get out on schedule to Hawaii.”
(Note about time differences: keeping track of chronology can be confusing with Fiji being 16 hours ahead of Boston time, so Stacy is usually a calendar day ahead. Adding Hawaii into the mix, typically 6 hours behind Boston time, further complicates telling the progression of events.)
So to make matters worse, the next day I received this email from Stacy:
“Cooper has some sort of stomach issue. He threw up last night in bed, had bad diarrhea this morning, and threw up again this afternoon. He’s otherwise okay, but a little low energy. No fever though. We’re keeping an eye on the weather. I mostly packed up today in case we have to leave early to get around potential flooding.”
From where Stacy lives in Fiji’s capital city Suva on the east side of the island, it is at least a three-hour drive on a two-lane, coastal road to Fiji’s international airport in Nadi on the island’s west side, and bad weather could certainly extend the time.
On April 8, this email came from Stacy:
“I located a hotel room in Nadi, so we will leave by car today at 3 pm. I have the room booked for 2 nights. When I called Fiji Airways, they said that all domestic and international flights scheduled for tomorrow were cancelled so far except ours, though I imagine that it will be cancelled or delayed. I may have to try to extend the hotel booking for a third night or find another room. Going to be challenging.
PS: Cooper seems to be better - at least he didn't throw up last night in bed”
But unfortunately, it still got worse, as I read in Stacy’s April 9 email:
“Our flight has now been officially cancelled. I will need to wait until tomorrow to find out if/when/how they can reschedule us.
The hotel we are in is not wonderful, but at least we have a room for tonight and tomorrow night. I may book us another night here in the morning if I can just as a precaution.
Cooper threw up again in the car on the way here. On himself, his car seat and soft monkey. I've tried to wash them all off. The car seat still smells a bit. Ugh.”
Poor Stacy. I emailed her:
“Oh Stacy, I feel so bad for you, with Cooper being sick & flight cancelled. I looked up online some remedies to eliminate vomit smell. We can try to buy some basic products, like vinegar & baking soda, in Hawaii to do so.
Sorry the hotel is not optimal. If you have nothing else to do, maybe you can find a better place to stay?”
And sadly, conditions went from bad to worse, as Stacy wrote again:
“Now I have Cooper’s stomach flu :-(
As all of the flights are cancelled in and out of Nadi today, there aren’t going to be any other hotel rooms. Plus Nadi floods during heavy rains and cyclones, so we are not moving from here, this stretch of road between hotel and airport does not flood. So we will tough it out.
I hope my stomach flu doesn’t last too long as it will be very hard to look after Cooper solo while sick.”
And later in the day (which in Fiji was Tuesday, their original departure day), I heard more from Stacy:
“I’ve been calling Fiji Airways for the past hour. We are confirmed on the Friday flight, which is the first one available. It will arrive in Honolulu at 11:59 pm on Thursday.” [Note: a day is gained due to crossing the international dateline from Fiji to Hawaii].
Now I wished we had just stayed home. We probably won’t be able to get back home until the cyclone passes tomorrow and it is safe to travel.”
So I started wondering what I should do, mainly about my own travel plans, not even thinking about the possibility of my getting sick too. I was weighing my options. Even though we had the AirBnB booked beginning on Tuesday, Stacy and Cooper would not be arriving until midnight Thursday. I could have spent two solo days in the pre-paid Waikiki condo but I had also been feeling rather pressured to leave again from home so soon, having just been away at length on the March babysitting trips. In checking with American Express Travel, I was pleasantly surprised that I could change my flight without monetary penalty. So that tipped the scale and I changed for a new arrival on Thursday.
But more concerning emails kept coming from Stacy, like the one I received on my Tuesday evening: “In taxi now. I was very sick last night and Cooper not 100% either, so probably a good thing that we weren’t on a plane.”
I replied, “So a silver lining in the gray rainy cyclone scenario. Hope getting home makes you both feel better.”
By my Wednesday morning, I heard from Stacy:
“We thought Cooper was getting over his stomach flu and then he threw up again at dinner. I called the doctor he sees who recommended taking him up to the private hospital. They gave us some antibiotics and various other meds to quell the vomiting and deal with his chest cold. I’m not sure if they 100% know what they are doing up there. I hope he’ll be well enough to travel on Friday. I’m doing better, I think. Hard to tell though as I took some Imodium-like pills to get me through the long car ride to Suva. Jason also not feeling 100%.”
Now I was getting even more worried and emailed at length:
“Dear Stacy,
Of course, it is very disconcerting that Cooper remains sick, and that Jason is starting to feel sick too.
Some thoughts:
1. They always say to give lots of fluids when kids are vomiting & have diarrhea to combat dehydration
2. Consider emailing Abby [her pediatrician cousin whose home we all had just stayed in New York ] if you have questions about Cooper. She is very receptive to your questions/concerns
3. Might you be considering bailing out of the whole Hawaii trip? Or going without Cooper? I totally understand if you have to change your plans due to illness.
This trip seems ill-fated with the cyclone and the stomach virus.
I am open to FaceTime with you later. I realize it is the middle of the night in Suva now, so you must be exhausted.
My current plans are to leave our house Thursday, 4:30 am, for a 6:30 am departure, connecting thru Dallas on way to Honolulu
xoxo, mom
By late Wednesday afternoon at my house, I finally heard some better news:
“Hi Mom,
Sorry - after emailing in the middle of the night, I slept in a bit. Cooper slept fairly well and wasn't sick again during the night. We got from the hospital pharmacy lots of things to treat him and Abby said in general they should be okay, just to make sure to give him oral rehydration salts, which we did this morning. I think he should be okay to travel tomorrow. I'm feeling mostly better too. Am at work today.
Love, Stacy”
So we all proceeded to Plan B and went to Hawaii. But not exactly as planned for me. There was a medical emergency (not me!) on board my flight shortly after Boston departure and we had to land at Dulles Airport (not Dallas! near Washington, DC) as originally scheduled. Another mishap! As I would miss my Dallas departure to Honolulu with anticipated arrival by 3 p.m., I was re-booked from Dulles to Los Angeles, connecting to Honolulu, with eventual arrival at 11 pm. What a long day that was going to be! But I finally got lucky in Los Angeles, and made an earlier connection to Honolulu with 6:30 pm arrival. I emailed Jesse and Stacy:
“Phew!! What a day. Hopefully no more dramas. Called Hertz to notify of later pick-up. Sent message to condo owners. I was originally booked & paid for first class seats, so very glad I got the last first class seat on this plane. Now I can have a glass of wine & take a nap. xoxo”
Fortunately, my luggage arrived in Honolulu with my changed flights and my rental car was available at the new time. I drove my way in the dark from the airport to Waikiki, managed to locate the building and its parking for the AirBnB, spoke to the apartment owner for final access details, and I was finally in! Being 2 a.m. Boston time, I was exhausted but still walked to a nearby convenience mart to pick up a few supplies. I emailed Stacy, “Call my mobile when you arrive from the airport & I will come down to let you in.” And then I let myself go to sleep.
Stacy and Cooper arrived later that night, as I emailed Jesse:
“Past 12:30 am Hawaii time when they arrived
They’re generally OK but still have a bit leftover illness,
We are going to bed, past 1:30 am here now”
I had to jump right into Cooper care the next morning as Stacy was already delayed for her first meeting. Cooper was upset to see his mommy leave, but I emailed Stacy later, “Cooper calmed down right away. When he got a bit fussy again, I gave him buttered toast. He ate all of it, cut in quarters. Did not fall asleep again yet but we will ease into our day.”
Eventually I got us out of the condo, put Cooper in the stroller, and walked several blocks to Waikiki beach.
Later I emailed Dr. Abby, updating her on Cooper:
“Glad Stacy sought your advice. Nana care has resumed with Stacy at her meeting all day. Cooper ate lightly, drank watered down milk, no vomiting, one mushy poop, some coughing, just had long stroller nap. So seems to be on the mend, certainly hope so.”
Over the weekend Jesse arrived, followed by Jason who fortunately was able to join us.
While Stacy went to more meetings we three adults entertained Cooper in scenic Waikiki, with fun-filled excursions to the beach and aquarium.
With daddy Jason in the house, I was no longer on the frontline of Cooper care, which was also fortunate.
So when Dr. Abby checked in a couple days later, I replied to her:
“Cooper seems to be doing better, eating well, no vomiting or fever the last couple days. Still has a bit of a cough & runny nose. But unfortunately, I started feeling bad this morning, dyspeptic & some vomiting after I ate a bit, also tired & a bit headachy. No doubt I got their germs. Hope it is not long lasting. At least the weather is warm. xoxo Beryl”
So that’s pretty much how the rest of my Hawaii vacation went, dealing with unwelcome Fiji germs, intermittent bouts of nasty stomach distress, and overall malaise. I got out occasionally but could not really enjoy Jason’s wonderfully prepared meals or accompany the family on a day trip to Oahu’s north shore. And I kept worrying whether I would recuperate in time for the long flights back to the United States and be well for the wedding, which had been a critical part of the original plan when I had agreed to babysit in Hawaii.
But luckily I did improve, just before we left, in time to watch Stacy present her keynote conference lecture, to take Cooper and Jason to IHOP for pancakes, and to get a manicure.
Thankfully, I was no longer sick to fly the long way back from Honolulu to Miami, arriving on Friday for the Saturday night wedding. Jesse seemed to have escaped the dreaded Fiji germs … until we dressed for the big occasion and joined family for pre-wedding drinks in the hotel bar. That’s as far as he made it. The Fiji germs hit him like a bomb and Papa Jesse was out for the night in our hotel room.
And that was not the only time up-close-and-personal Nana encounters have laid me low from Fiji germs. That will be my next blog. (I didn’t realize that this one would be so long.)
Meanwhile, as we all deal with love in the time of coronavirus, heed advice, be smart, stay safe, wash hands, social distance, even from beloved grandkids, and be thankful for FaceTime, Skype and Zoom. Countering this frightening and never-ending pandemic is our underappreciated modern ability to see our loved ones in motion as we speak with them, just like Bell Telephone promised at the 1964 New York World’s Fair exhibition. Yes, I was there.
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